Let’s face it, we have all been there. Tantrums. At one point in time in your child’s life, you will have had to deal with a tantrum and our little angels embarrassing themselves and you in front of the whole wide world.
During this time you may feel like the world’s worst parent but in reality, you are just doing your best and that is great.
However, below are my top 5 easy steps for mastering your child’s tantrums:
Step 1 – Remain calm
I know, I know this is easier said than done and while you are sitting here reading this you are probably already shouting at the screen but trust me, this is the best option when dealing with your demon child at this stage. The calmer you are, the quicker the situation will deflate.
It is far too easy to start raising voices, threatening all manner of actions but stop, breathe and remain calm at all times.
Step 2 – Walk away
If your child is in a safe environment then simply walk away. If you react to their outburst then they will continue to act up, scream and shout and generally play on your emotions and theirs.
By walking away you are showing your child that it is not affecting you and the timescale of the tantrum will be reduced. Although it may seem like you are being ignorant you always remember to keep an eye on your child from a distance that is safe.
Step 3 – Leave all bartering behaviour behind
Never ever negotiate. Bartering and bribery are strictly forbidden at this point. As easy as it may seem to just give in with a bribe you will only be making a rod for your own back and at a later point in time, this will come back to bite you and more importantly, your child will remember this and know that a tantrum equals a reward.
Step 4 – Quiet voices
As I mentioned earlier, we have all been in a position where we have had an embarrassing public tantrum on our hands and if you are anything like me, you may have raised your voice.
By using a quiet and soothing voice your child will realise that they are not getting the rise they wanted and will start to calm down slowly. The louder the voices, the longer the episode.
Step 5 – Be a role model
Behaviour breeds behaviour and if your child sees you acting in a certain way then, of course, they are going to copy, mimic and become you. Think about your behaviour in their everyday life and keep in mind that children are just like sponges.
The majority of children strive to be like mummy or daddy and with the right guidance they can be a “mini-me” but let’s make sure that it is one that you will be proud of.
After all is said and done, tantrums are a way of life. They are opportunities for your child to express their feelings in a way that they know will pull at the heartstrings and although they will happen, aggressive behaviour is not acceptable and if at any point in time you witness this, you must intervene in a verbal, communicative way.
Once the tantrum has ended and your child has calmed down, then it is time to communicate with your child. Try and understand why the situation arose and look at ways of dealing with these feelings for future use. And once you have survived all of that, have a great big cuddle.